The idea for this film came at
the tail end of an extreme depression.
I’ll give you a bit of backstory:
Since I was a child I knew I
wanted to be an actor. I studied at a performing arts high school. I got a
university degree in theater. Soon after graduating I found an agent who really
believed in me, I started auditioning and booking work, and for about 3 years my primary source of income came from my acting. I felt I had a good amount of
momentum going. So, in 2012 I decided to
move to Los Angeles in an attempt to take my career to the next level.
I arrived with extremely high
hopes, ready to take on new and exciting roles. Ready for the city to embrace
me!!!
That’s not what happened.
When I got here, I found the city
to be indifferent to my arrival.
I was unable to get good representation in LA and stopped auditioning all together. I struggled to even find a minimum wage, regular job to pay the bills. I ended up alone and living in an apartment with
no furniture that kinda resembled a crackhouse, in a terrible neighborhood, where after I’d find street parking at night I’d literally run from my car to the
front door of my apartment complex. And occasionally shady-looking individuals
would be so kind as to escort me by running right behind me.
At my lowest point I had $2.75 in
my bank account and several maxed out credit cards. I was dating a drunk who
often couldn’t remember my name and pretty soon I started drinking heavily myself.
One night after a drunken bender I was walking the streets of Hollywood at 2:00am
crying, and felt so lonely that I gave my phone number to Tony, a homeless man
that I passed on Sunset Blvd. (We still keep in touch)
After about a year of utter
hopelessness I was lucky enough to discover something called “10 Mg of Prozac
daily”. It helped me to change my attitude. I moved out of the crackhouse, got
a part time job, started eating kale, stopped dating douchebags and
entered into a positive romantic relationship. Things were lookin up! I was
happy.
Somewhat.
However much I’d changed my
attitude, there was still a big void. I had, for so long, defined myself by my
career. It had always been the source of my self-esteem. How could I possibly
retrieve that feeling of pride I had in my work? Especially when you consider I
live in a town where, to save my life, I’d be unable to get an audition for a
re-enactment on America’s Most Wanted. How can I beat this system?
Easy. I’ll just write, direct and
star in a feature film!
So I started writing a script…….
Are you now beginning to see the light at the end of this tunnel??? Well, don’t get too excited, because I need to tell you something: The script I wrote wasn’t very good.
